Does the 2020 election remind you of conflicts at work? I’ve been in situations where there are two “camps,” each one sure that they’re right and that the other camp is totally wrong. You may organizationally be on the same team, you know what’s expected of you, but you can’t move your project to fruition without getting the whole team on board. But, there’s a group that thinks you’re all wrong.
This lack of clarity sends your stress level through the roof and saps your strength. Your boss, despite making sympathetic noises when you complain, isn’t taking steps to favor either side. Then there’s an expected milestone event that everyone is sure that will clarify things. (just like the 2020 election) Maybe that milestone event is a meeting with the board or the boss’s boss. Both sides lobby for their position. That milestone event happens and there is no more clarity than there was before.
Neither side is validated. You’re deflated and feel betrayed. What do you do?
The first thing that you need to do is to ask yourself; “how important is it to me to be right?” Is it more important than your relationship with your employer? If you’ve decided that your job is more important, move on to the next step.
Second, recognize that for whatever reason, the boss sees value in both you and those “other people.” They are going to be in your professional life until you leave that job. To meet your goals, you are going to have to figure out how to work with them.
The next step is to begin to appreciate “them” as people. Do you know who their children are, what they like to do in their spare time? Although it may feel like a waste of time to chit chat to learn these things, sharing personal information makes people seem less like the other.
Fourth, as you get to know them, try to understand why the boss sees them as valuable. You already know what their challenges are. Take time to identify their strengths and understand the value they add to your company.
Finally, when you have to work together, try to find common ground. Both sides want the company or department to be successful. What else can you agree on? Figure out what you each have to give so that everyone can succeed.
